It used to be back when I was still taking prescription drugs that my Golden Hour was approximately 1:00 am in the early morning when I would walk with my dog to the 24 hour store, buy my French vanilla latte and come home and take an Adderall to create my 5-6 hour golden elixir.
Those days have been over for almost three months and now the highlight of my day is taking extra strong diet pills at around 6 in the morning to get the buzz from the energy emitted from these tiny bad boys.
I knew when I was taking my golden elixir just how good I really had it-not a blog went by that I didn't mention it, and I don't think my readers minded hearing about my tincture daily. I believe many of the other maniacs keeping such hours like myself reveled in the Adderall and Xanax combination I had going for over twelve years.
Now, I sleep closer to 4:00 am and I wait until close to 6:00am to take the diet pills to power me through my early morning of heading to my support club to make the coffee and set up for the support group meeting I attend every Monday through Friday from 7:30am to 8:30am,
The diet pills mixed with coffee are a decent buzz but nothing compares to the pink Adderall tablets I took religiously. I can't find diet pills any stronger than the ones I am taking now and they barely make my heart skip a beat.
Medical detox has been a killer as I went through a hospital stay starting on March 6th, 2K17 and got discharged on March 18rh, 2K17. I came out of the hospital for nothing for the withdrawals I was experiencing at the time or the ones that got ten times worse as the phenobarbital wore off in my system,
It wasn't until about a month ago, when I thought I had become a lost cause, with the inability to write, talk in complete sentences, and drink without drooling that I met a new head doctor who after taking one look at me told me I was in a state of severe withdrawals and needed to go onto a high valium taper to detox humanely. Her name is Lisa, and this woman saved my life and gave me my old self back to a great degree.
Thus far, I haven't really started a taper off the high dosage of valium she initially put me on because I am still going through mighty severe withdrawals. I am on a very high dose of valium: 25 mgs three times a day: that is right a total of 75 mg of valium of a day. It is what is needed to combat the 10 mg of Xanax a day I took for twelve years.
I recently asked her about going back on Adderall and boy is she good; she said and give you a speedball combination? I never knew what a speedball was because I never have done illicit drugs but essentially the high I loved from the Adderall that I loved to chase with a two mg bar of Xanax was essentially a speedball. It was such an amazing combination.
I think often about doctor shopping because I know I could get back on the Adderall and Xanax no problem, but I have come this far through holy hell with the medical detox to go back onto the very shit that caused this speedsplatt situation.
I am trying a new diet pill today and just took my first two pills at 3:00 pm. I am hoping for a kick in of zip that I can do a dance with, with my valium script. It wont be like the Adderall/Xanax but maybe close enough to make me get up again at 1:00am.
I will blog tomorrow with an update but right now this prescription addict has got to get moving or I am going to fall asleep and it isn't even 6pm.
Corey
BORN THIS WAY-2K17
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